Uncle Grandpa's Wacky Shenanigans
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Dick Dastardly and Muttley get some unneeded help from Uncle Grandpa.
1. Chapter 1

Dick Dastardly and Muttley both groaned as they were in the middle of a desert, losing the race as they were failing yet again.

"Drat, drat, and DOUBLE DRAT!" Dastardly exclaimed as he slammed on his wheel, shaking his head. "Is there any way for this day to get worse?"

"GOOD MORNING!" Uncle Grandpa exclaimed as he ran over Dastardly and Muttley in his RV.

"...I had to open my big fat mouth." Dastardly groaned, slamming Muttley on the head after hearing the dog chuckle.

"Looks like you need some help." Uncle Grandpa stated as he popped Dastardly and Muttley back to normal, placing his hands on his hips as he gasped. "Say, aren't you two the stars of Wacky Races?"

"That we are." Dastardly proudly stated as he and Muttley posed.

"Well, I know how to make you win!" Uncle Grandpa stated as he pulled out a crayon and began scribbling, making the random spot in the desert the finish line, with Dastardly and Muttley past it.

"Wow, we actually won without doing anything!" Dastardly exclaimed as he took off his purple and red hat, being that surprised.

"Oh, it's no problem, I always help out children or childish people in need!" Uncle Grandpa stated as he gave Dastardly the first place trophy.

Dastardly chuckled as he held the trophy high above him, only for it to fall on top of him, squashing him. Muttley laughed alongside Uncle Grandpa, with Dastardly bonking both of them on the head, knocking them out cold.


	2. Chapter 2

"So I'm not really helping, huh?" Uncle Grandpa stated as he noticed how flattened Dick Dastardly and Muttley were.

"No!" Dick Dastardly shouted angrily as he sighed. "It reminds me when I was racing with those weird bozos from those different universes..."

 _A flashback then occurred, with a different set of racers zipping alongside Dick Dastardly and Muttley as they were cruising through the Grand Canyon, with Dick Dastardly having a hard time trying to cheat his way through victory._

 _"Drat, drat, and double drat!" Dick Dastardly cursed as Muttley chuckled. "My devious cheating isn't working! Time for dastardly drastic measures!"_

 _Tiny Kong farted loudly as she laughed, fanning the gas from her burping big butt. "My name might be tiny, but my body sure isn't!"_

 _"Let me smash 'em with my Piko Piko Hammer!" Amy Rose taunted as she spun her red and yellow hammer around, smirking with confidence._

 _"Tahaya!" Toadette exclaimed with glee as she spun around. "Let's shroom it up!"_

 _"Ooh, can I sing?" Aria Meloetta sung in a high pitched voice while rubbing her paddle shaped hands together. "I even brought some icing!"_

 _"Oh Korttork," Dry Bowser groaned as he dusted off his dusty bones. "This isn't going as I hoped."_

 _"Loopy tea! Leave this to me!" Petey Piranha exclaimed as he began dancing to the beat._

 _"Oh, it's no use." Silver The Hedgehog sighed as he shook his head. "We're not going to prevail."_

 _"Don't think like that, mah boi." Chrom remarked while eating his chrome enhancing fish sticks. "It's our time to tip the scales!"_

 _R.O.B. shook his metal head. "I calculate that this race is not going to be in our robotic favor."_

 _"I will eliminate these worthless racing models!" E-123 Omega boasted as he began firing off his arm cannons everywhere._

 _Arceus chuckled as he closed his eyes. "I could twist the outcome of this race with my godly might if I choose to. But where's the fun in that?"_

 _"Let's go up and down and all around!" Rayquaza exclaimed as he fired off a random Hyper Beam. "I want to roll around at the speed of sound!"_

 _"Watch out for my stylish grace." Lady Palutena stated with a smirk. "It's cute AND dangerous, and comes with a funny face!"_

 _"M-my!" Isabelle exclaimed as she placed her adorable paws on her face. "Isn't that a bit hefty for a race?"'_

"...Sounds fun!' Uncle Grandpa stated as he turned to see his RV explode into various pieces. "I should try to get myself into these racers. Maybe."

The area that the two were in, which was a swamp, suddenly began exploding as they were filming a scene for Michael Bay's Transformers, with the other actual Wacky Racers going by as they avoiding the various explosions.


	3. Chapter 3

"Seems like that giant Landmaster could use a bit of a tune down, huh?" Uncle Grandpa stated to Dick Dastardly, who was trying to spring a trap.

"Yes, it could." Dastardly responded as he was covered in oil, trying to tweak his ingenious plot as Muttley snickered.

Uncle Grandpa decided to help out, transforming into a traffic cone as he hopped in front of the Army Surplus Special tank, confusing the drivers.

"What the hell?" Sergeant Blast commented as he squinted his eyes at the cone, noticing Uncle Grandpa's face. "What is that?"

"I-I d-don't have a c-clue, sir!" Private Meekly exclaimed meekly as the tank flipped over, landing on its top as Uncle Grandpa popped back to normal.

"HOLY COW I DID IT!" Uncle Grandpa stated as he gave himself a high five, with the other hand belonging to another Uncle Grandpa as the impact caused Dastardly's trap to explode on Dastardly and Muttley, with Penelope Pitstop speeding by.

"Oh my." Penelope Pitstop remarked in her southern belle accent as she then accidentally ran over Uncle Grandpa, causing her vehicle to blow up as she was covered in smoke, turning into a pile of ashes as a result.


End file.
